Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Goodbyes

Well, today probably marks one of the hardest goodbyes of my life
okay, the hardest
today I said goodbye to my sweet brother
who is probably already sleeping by now...
his first night in the Provo MTC...
where he will stay for 13 days before flying across the country to Richmond Virginia
Where he will serve for 24 months...


I will be honest
 it's kind of a relief to have that taken care of...
I have been dreading this day for a month
seriously dreading it for about two weeks
and in complete denial all this week
Don't get me wrong today ripped my heart right out of my chest
but I am glad it's over.
I know I am going to be extremely lonely for him these next two years
Tatey has been my best friend all my life
and I automatically flashback to sitting on his bed for hours a countless number of nights
laughing, crying, playing tetris...
so to say I am going to miss him is an understatement
but I really feel like it is going to be easier
rather that imagining, it's actually happening
and it's a downward slop
now I can say he'll be home in 730 days :)


This week has been really special though
we were all able to spend quite a bit of time together as a family
Jack and I slept over Saturday night
spent the entire day Sunday with him
And then all of yesterday we got to spend together
You want to talk about a few miracles?
Yesterday 3 of my 5 classes were canceled..
when does that ever happen??
So I went to the early class and played hooky during the last one
we got to spend the entire afternoon together
We got to go on one last special temple date 
and ate too much at his favorite place
Cheesecake Factory :)

I have been really blessed
I have been able to feel my Father in Heaven's love many times
that burning feeling?
it's real
but last night...
you couldn't help but cry because of the warmth and love that was in that room
I have known all along Nate was meant to serve
I have been so incredibly proud of him for deciding to go completely on his own
but I hadn't felt peace until last night...
I have been anxious, and worrying, and praying he wouldn't get lonely, or sick, or have anything else sad happen to him while away 
I won't go too in depth but last night was a true manifestation of what an incredible brother I have.
and I know he's going to be okay :)


I know he's going to have some rough times
and that kills me a little
but I also know he is going to be a phenomenal missionary
anyone who knows Tatey knows he's a natural born leader
he is dedicated
when he sets his mind to something he not only wants to be good at it, he wants to be great
he puts forth his best effort in all he does
He and I have gone through a lot of incredibly spiritual experiences together
our papa's baptism, our cousin passing away, our family being sealed
we have talked a million times about how lucky we are to have an eternal family
and now he gets to go share that with others
I know without a doubt his sweet spirit is going to touch so many people in Richmond
He is definitely meant to be going there
So saying goodbyes are hard
but when you put it into perspective
it's not going to be that bad


xoxo,

Ashlie




2 comments:

  1. Wow my sweet daughter I LOVE you!! I absolutely love you with all my heart! xoxoxo

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  2. This made me cry. He is going to be INCREDIBLE! Love you ��

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